Seriously, TLC has put together a pretty rosy picture of polygamy. There was not a prairie dress or child bride to be found.
The only thing I did not really care for was the douchy husband, Cody.
I think he is as smug and slimy as Bill Henrickson.
But Matt is so level-headed and sweet, I think we could make a go of it without him getting all big-headed or growing boy band hair.
So assuming Matt is game, I have picked out my sister wives:
1-- Lorelai Glimore.
I think we could have fun drinking over-sized mugs of coffee and making obscure pop-culture references while folding laundry. I hope she is still friends with Sookie (though I think that Sookie may have her very own show now-- so she may not have time to hang out with us).
2-- Kristin Wiig. She is just so damn funny and since we probably won't be able to afford to go out, we will need her around for some entertainment.
I promise I will only make her do that Lawrence Welk singing-sister act once a day. They did not really touch on it in the TLC show, but according to Big Love, the first wife is the Boss!
3-- and since we are going to be having a lot of fun, talking smack and laughing, we will probably need someone that can cook.
I thought about Paula Dean, but I don't think Matt would go for that.
I thought about Giada.
But then I got worried that she might be too sexy and stir up jealousy issues with me and Lorelai and Kristin. Besides, she strikes me as a Nicky-style trouble maker and honestly, who has time for that?
And Rachel Ray is out of the question for obvious reasons.
(That being that I want to punch her in the face every time that she opens her damn trap).
I just realized that celebrity chefs are all super annoying.
I am out of ideas. Any suggestions???
In all seriousness, if given the choice between the polygamist (Browns) and the quiverfull (Duggars), I would go with the polygamists.
The Duggars scare the crap out of me.
